Author: | Nola | Published: | over 6 years ago |
---|---|---|---|
Tags: | word choices, meaning, clarity, flow | Category: | Writing tips |
You’re reading a novel. The heroine is running from a ruthless killer. Your blood is pumping along with hers and then … you have to stop and re-read a sentence because it isn’t clear. Writing coach Margie Lawson calls these glitches ‘speed bumps’. Just as a physical speed bump disrupts your smooth ride over bitumen, literary speed bumps disrupt your ride through an author’s words and take you out of their story. Over the next few weeks I’ll look at some common literary speed bumps and show you how to avoid them. Let’s start with the dilemma of unfamiliar words. Consider the following:
Unless you’re aiming to bamboozle readers with your brilliant vocabulary, try these solutions to eradicate the ‘tricky word’ speed bump.
1. Use familiar words where possible.
Rather than confusing your reader with obnubilating cachinnations, it would be a lot simpler to say something like this: ‘Gerald’s loud laughter failed to cloud Felicity’s resolve. She kissed him before he could object.’
2. Use context to cue the reader.
A portmanteau is a case or bag used to carry clothes while travelling; however, it’s not a word commonly heard these days. You could just say ‘suitcase’, but if you’re writing an historical novel, you would probably want to keep the actual word for authenticity. In such cases (no pun intended), use context to help the reader understand what you mean. Miranda could say, ‘I’ll pop upstairs and pack some clothes in my portmanteau’. Even if the reader doesn’t know exactly what it is, they’ll understand it’s something to pack clothes in, and they can move on with the story.
3. Have one character explain the word to another.
This should be used sparingly, but can be effective for technical aspects of your manuscript. In this example from the first episode of Stargate Atlantis, astrophysicist Rodney McKay is trying to explain the importance of a ZPM to General Jack O’Neill.
4. Use a glossary.
Although a glossary is mainly used in nonfiction books, I’ve also seen it in novels where a lot of complicated or new terms are used, or where words from different languages are featured. For example, L. D. Taylor included a glossary of computer terms in her young adult novel Motive Games, and Colleen Coble included a glossary of Hawaiian words in her Aloha Reef series. While a glossary can provide a ready reference for readers, it shouldn’t be used in place of clear writing in the text.
A Final Word
Using these strategies is not a matter of ‘dumbing down’. You can still write beautifully, yet be clear. Just ensure that if someone stops to re-read one of your sentences, it’s because they’re marvelling at your beautiful prose and not because they have no clue what you’re talking about. Here are some examples of exquisite writing that is also easy to understand.
Do you have any other examples of beautiful prose that’s easy to understand? I’d love to hear from you.
(N.B. I omitted a couple of short lines from the Stargate Atlantis segment. You can find the full transcript at the following link: http://stargate.kaashif.co.uk/transcripts/atl/1.01)
Comments read 8 comments
"Undomesticated equines could not move me from this spot, O'Neil"
LOL - Thanks for that, Adam. Lots of great one-liners in Stargate SG-1 and Stargate Atlantis. I was trying to find a good one from Samantha Carter, but had to settle for Rodney :)
Thanks, Nola. Really enjoyed this. One other thing that I like - especially in fantasy with lots of characters - is a character list with brief description. This helps heaps if a character suddenly reappears in a new, significant way and I've forgotten who they are.
Thanks Annie. That's a great idea. I've found that helpful too, especially in fantasy or sci-fi when the character names are often a bit different too. Often harder to remember than the names that are more familiar to us. Thanks for taking the time to comment (twice) :)
Some great tips, Nola. Love the examples - maybe if we are going to use more obscure words, packing them all into one sentence is not the best way to go lol. I've been known to use a few weird words & have both a glossary and character list in Akrad's Children, but I agree that as much as possible, it's better to use context & dialogue to make the meaning of words clear, if one can.
Thanks Jenny. Although my example was exaggerated, I've come across sentences in books that aren't too different from that. Either the author has a fabulous vocabulary or has Thesaurus-itis :) Those glossaries and character lists certainly help for epic fantasy novels. I think you've done your fantasy stories really well. Even though there were unusual words, it was usually easy to get the gist of things from the context. I also find it helpful if not too many new terms are introduced all at once. I'll have to remember that when I write my bestselling sci-fi novel :) Thanks for taking the time to comment.
Enjoyed your blog post thanks. I love this - "Beyond the violet-blue of the window, rimmed with shadows of the ragged curtains, a flight of white stars slanted across the sky." In context - seen from the bed of two very poor girls in the slums of Sydney. From the trilogy of The Harp in the South (I forget which novel of the trilogy.) Published back in late 1940s.
That's a great quote, Jeanette. A brilliant example of clear, yet beautiful, writing. I haven't read that trilogy, but remember there was a mini-series based on it many years ago. Thanks for commenting.
Comments for this post have closed.